Bored

Wow, today I was so bored to be taking on my sick staff's work AGAIN that I ended up reading the employee handbook...disciplinary procedure section.

I caught myself daydreaming.

...

Examples of misconduct are (which are not exhaustive): persistent lateness, unacceptable level of absence, refusal to obey a reasonable instruction.

Does 38 days of absence over the last 10 months for flatulence qualify for unacceptable level of absence?

Daydream... 'Gubino Ducon, get the fart out!'

....And now I know I could dismiss Philippe Focker sur-le-champ!

Daydream... 'Focker, take your shitty screen mirror, the picture of your fake whore girlfriend and get out of the premises, you haven't obeyed to my order!'

I could fire my whole team for misconduct!

Damn, Miserable Middle Managers should always read the HR Handbook! 

Free extra HR and employment advices for MMMs and employees :
http://www.acas.org.uk/
http://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/