The quickie

I had another fabulous job search encounter last Friday that I had never experienced before so I thought I would share it.

There are a couple of recruitment agencies that I trust and work with regularly....I mean there are a couple of mofos that are less bad that others....I call them the special agents - any other agent being a moronistic scumbag.

So last thrusday, a senior special agent calls me :

Him : Miserable, I have found Ze job for you, the job of your best and wildest dreams. I have no job spec but I think you are the perfect match for it, and the MD of the company, MediaPestus, is my best friend. I am having dinner with him in about 15 minutes, shall I mention your name?

Me : it sounds great but a bit junior, are you sure that the level will match my expectations?

Him : off course it is super senior honey bunny, and you will get the dosh you want, trust me

Me : ok, if the dosh are in, I am in


Comes Friday, special agent PA calls me, texts me : CALL ME NOW! So I call back :

Her : the MD of Mediapestus has heard about you, he said you have excellent references, he is super excited about you and he wants to meet you asap-before-eop i.e. 2PM, what do you think? And sorry to rush you, and don't worry if you can't prepare, he is aware of it, it will be very informal.

Me: hmpf - informal informal...in the end he will still make a call on the chat!

Her: don't worry babe, he had a boner as soon as he heard your name.

Me: Okay then, go on


Comes 2PM I am ready :

Super black mascara special long eyelashes effect : check
Short deep V cleavage dress : check
High heels : check
Red nail varnish : check
Gloss super glossy : check
Brains : not sure but check

MD guy comes, pretty cute, pretty young, pretty excited :

Him : Hello Mis, how you doing, I am soooooooooooooo happy to meet you, I hope you don't mind the rush and the mess, as soon as I heard of you I wanted to see you.
I want you, I want to make love to your CV and experience, I think we are a match from heaven, I am going to haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaave you right now on the taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaable!!!!!!!!!!

Me : ok ok, that's great, when shall I start then?

Him : so, tell me about the market, the competitors, our technology, what clients do you think we should target, what strategy do you think we should adopt blaaaaaaaaaaah...........

Me : you perv

Him : I hope you don't mind, I have lined up 2 more interviews for you, our head of hisarse and our VP of hercunt. They are really nice, as soon as I hear their feedback I will get in touch with special agent.

Me : sure, I love threesome interviews, give me more


....


So, what was an informal chat became a full unpaid consultancy session. It is Tuesday now and I still haven't heard of them : quickie but long rejection!


Where is the job search police?!!